I am finally ready to be my own. Ever since my first boyfriend in high school, I have always jumped from guy to guy – relationship to relationship. Finding healing form the past in the excitement of the new. And all these years later, I am so so ready to be my own. Because the truth is, I cannot rely on other people for happiness the way I have been. I need to rely on myself – my interests, my intrinsic qualities, and the greater causes I seek to serve.
I have never been in a relationship with myself. I have not taken the time to be alone and truly get to know myself. I constantly surround myself with people so that I don’t have to be alone with my thoughts. My thoughts about myself and my overall self-image are negative, so I avoid that headspace as frequently as possible. The only time I spend alone usually is the short while before I go to bed, and it tends to be an anxiety-producing time.
I write about this because I imagine I am not alone in the fear of being alone. But I challenge us to be alone and find empowerment in that. Get to know yourself.
After all, how can you expect someone else to date you when you refuse to date yourself?